Second shot at a synopsis

The first one was bland. Is this any better?

Books are ADAM VERLAIN’s life, so when he was asked to pick up an extremely rare first edition of “Alice in Wonderland”, he was happy to go. Just hop over to Los Angeles, be handed the book, and hop back to London. All nice and simple…except for one little problem.

CASEY BLANCHARD.

She’s the top line movie star who inherited the book, and she won’t give it to Adam unless he accompanies her to a movie premier and party, that night. Her reason for the demand is mysterious but obviously has a lot to do with her ex-boyfriend, LANDO GRISSOM, who’s a big action-movie hero.

Adam is forced to agree, because he learns that if he does not get the book, he’ll lose his job. So Casey has a style guru named ORISI remake him from the skin out...including pink underwear (“It’s salmon colored!” swears Orisi), bubble bath, pedicure, and a ten-thousand dollar tux. After all, he has to be presentable on the premier’s red carpet.

Of course, nothing goes according to plan. Then at the party, which for some insane reason is at Lando’s Beverly Hills home, Adam almost drowns, ruins the tux, has a verbal sparring match with Lando, and nearly becomes diner for a black panther named Gertrude. He also realizes Casey was using him to make Lando jealous.

By this point, Adam wonders if he’s fallen down his own rabbit hole into the madness that is Hollywood, especially once he discovers the book has vanished, and Gertrude has a kitty-crush on him, and he’s fallen for Casey.

Will he make it back to London with the “Alice”… and his heart…and his sanity intact? Or will he awake and find it was all just a dream of wonderland? Don't ask the mad hatter; he'll only lie.

So close...

I have 10-15 pages left to do on A65 -- connecting Adam and Casey in the limo headed for the premier of her movie to Lando's party, and expanding some of the ending, which is a bit too rushed and not as funny as I'd like, yet. Or as jolting.

This is the short synopsis -- really more of a pitch that I worked out. Needs to be sharper and more to the point while giving a bit more detail...but it's a start.

An Alice ’65 is the very rare, first edition, presentation copy of Lewis Carroll’s “Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland”, published in 1865. Only fifteen copies of the book were known to be in existence…until a sixteenth one appeared in the hands of CASEY BLANCHARD, a steel-willed movie starlet living in Beverly Hills. She’s agreed to sell it to a University in London, but everything has to be kept very hush-hush because someone else is after the book for his own collection, and he does not take “No” for an answer.

So the university sends ADAM VERLAIN, an introverted book cataloger, to Los Angeles to pick up that copy and bring it straight home. Problem is, Casey wants to use Adam to make her ex-boyfriend, LANDO GRISSOM, jealous and won’t give him the book unless he goes along with her plans. He is forced to agree, so she has him styled up by a fussy fashion guru and takes him to a movie premier…where he winds up not being allowed to see the movie…and to a party at Lando’s home…where he is thrown out, almost drowns trying to get back in, and is nearly killed by a pet panther named Gertrude. And that’s just the beginning of his troubles.

Gertrude escapes and comes looking for Adam; the book vanishes; the paparazzi smell a story and hound his and Casey’s every move; troubles just keep piling up. Plus someone is watching and waiting till the book shows up in the right hands…so it can be stolen away. It doesn’t take long for Adam to wonder if he’s fallen down his own rabbit hole into the madness that is Hollywood, and fear that he may not make it out with his sanity…or the book…intact.

It's turning into more of a romantic-comedy, I think, even though I still can't see Adam and Casey winding up together at the end. Just two ships colliding in the night and trying not to sink.

But then...that's how most relationships work out, isn't it?

Writing is cutting...

I dropped 5 of 10 pages of Adam and Casey in a limo and dealing with paparazzi while trying to get coffee because it went on and on. It had some pertinent information, but I can slip that in elsewhere. What's important is, the relationship between Adam and Casey is established in those 5 pages, and it has the better jokes. Now we cut to the red carpet and the games Casey and Lando like to play with each other.

I also dropped a Russian bit that was making things too damn complicated. I don't want this script to be more than 105 pages. Period. I think I can make that work as a comedy and romance...and a sort of coming of age story. Not sure about how...but never hurts to see what happens.

I'm finding Adam loves books. His father had an antiquarian book shop in London and Adam was the only one of his brothers and sisters who liked going to it. But being a book dealer in the age of Kindle and Nook is hard as hell. One thing I've heard about the trade is, there are very few young collectors coming in. The ones I know about, who were under the age of 30 when they started collecting, went for children's books and fine bindings rather than books by Jane Austen, Edgar Allen Poe, or Mark Twain. And the older collectors are beginning to die off.

I did know of some who were building libraries of first editions of all the books they'd read, their goal being to donate the collection to a library or college. But I'm hearing that's not happening so much, anymore. A really nice collection of books on fishing and hunting that I packed and shipped to an auction house a couple years ago didn't sell as a whole and no one's interested in it being given away.

The world of books is changing...but I wonder if that's permanent or just a phase. We won't know for some time, yet.

Writing is re-writing...and rewriting...and...

I had to do some major revisions to the work I'd already done...mainly because of logistics, not character. Initially I had Casey's house in Malibu on the ocean and Lando's in Beverly Hills...but that didn't work. They need to be closer together, and I can't drop the B-Hills part because of a scene where Adam tries to get on a bus headed for Santa Monica.

I'm also finding the story is gently aligning itself with some of the events in "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland." Gertrude is the Cheshire Cat. I've got the Mad Hatter's tea party pretty much set up; just need the sleepy hedgehog and the vested rabbit...which may work in thanks to characters who've popped up. But that leaves the Queen and caterpillar. And how could I work in the croquet match?

It's been so long since I read the book...but I don't want it to be too obvious an alignment, so I'm not going to read it, again. Just rely on my vague memory to keep it low key.

I also changed Adam's shower during the Orisi reworking of him to a bath. Works better and now figures in later.

I think I've fallen in love with Adam and Casey. I want things to work out between them, but reality is...they're from completely different worlds. We'll have to leave that option open, for now, but I can't imagine her leaving her career to be with him. Nor does that work for me, politically. I hate it when women give up their dreams for their men. Why can't it be the other way around?

Case in point -- Ross and Rachel in "Friends". She gave up her dream job to be with him. Why couldn't he have gone to Paris to be with her? They don't teach paleontology at the Sorbonne? There's no Museum of Natural History in any of the Arrondisements? C'mon. this is the 21st Century; movies need to catch up to the realities of the times.

BUT...and this a biggie...what would Adam do if he gave it all up for Casey? Become an antiquarian dealer? I know those people. NOT a good choice.

Still got my thinking cap on for that.

Inspiration strikes HARD

Obviously, the man in this photo is psychotic...but I love the chaos of the image and am posting it on my desktop to remind myself that A65 needs all my focus to keep it from being a boring POS like "Notting Hill". Even my quiet moments must have sparks to them.

I'm not sorry I watched the movie. But this is the second British "comedy" slash "romance" or something or other that has been so fucking careful and simplistic and ridiculous about its telling, I found myself doing other things to keep from falling asleep. I don't need Jim Cary style comedy or such; I just like there to be some sort of energy behind the scene.

What's sad is, I like Hugh Grant and Julia Roberts. He's an amazingly attractive Englishman and she's got charisma to spare, when she lets it out. And yet...I saw nothing in the way of an honest connection between the two. Man, this is a perfect example of the importance of casting.

I remember another film I saw, years ago -- "The Counterfeit Traitor" with William holden and Lili Palmer. It's set during WW2 and he's a Swedish-American businessman who's basically blackmailed into helping gather information for the Allies. His contact is Lili Palmer, who's the wife of a German soldier. They're pretending to have an affair, but it develops into a real one. Only problem was, there was zero chemistry between them.

William Holden could burn up the screen just standing still, when he wanted to. His dance with Kim Novak in "Picnic" is a classic moment of on-screen eroticism. Plus, Lili Palmer could connect beautifully with the right actor. Her moments with John Garfield in "Body and Soul" are near poetry. So it's not the actors' abilities or whether the camera likes them or not.

Katherine Hepburn and Spencer Tracy had it through several movies. So did Humphrey Bogart and Lauren Bacall. Burt Lancaster and Deborah Kerr sizzled in "From Here to Eternity" as did Montgomery Clift and Elizabeth Taylor in "A Place in the Sun". And as much as I disliked "Titanic", Kate and Leo had it.

Of course, a lot of that is just chance. You never know who will connect in front of a camera, and that makes me nervous about what will happen when "The Alice '65" gets made. I can just see them casting a pretty-boy like Robert Pattison as Adam and Kristen Stewart as Casey. Uhg! I think I'd kill the casting director.

I gotta figure out some way of having input into that decision.

I wrote a song...

Adam sings it in A65 during a very important moment.


Ich sehe mich eine kleine Kätzchen.
Soll ich Ihnen sagen, ich bin gebissen
durch die Liebe. Es ist viel zu schrecklich.
Ja?

Ich hatte zu folgen, nur um ihren
schönen Körper zu sehen, als sie ging.
Weil mein Herz schlug so stark und so wahr.

Die Art, wie sie atmet.
Die Art, wie sie geht.
Die Art, wie sie lacht mich an und spricht.
Es gibt keine andere Fraulein, die
bringen mir könnte eine solche Liebe.

Die Art, wie sie atmet.

Die Art, wie sie geht.

Die Art, wie sie lacht mich an und spricht.

Es gibt keine andere Fraulein, die

bringen mir könnte eine solche Liebe.

Sie ist so richtig für mich

Ich hoffe, diese Nacht wird auf mich
lächeln und machen mir das Leben herrlich.

Ich sehe mich eine kleine Kätzchen.

Soll ich Ihnen sagen, ich bin gebissen

durch die Liebe. Es ist viel zu schrecklich.

Ja?

Google does a good translation...I hope. And that will tell you what it's all about.

Tschüss.

Paul Krugman goes *snap*

He posted this on his blog, today. God, I hope he's right.
-------------
Sympathy for the Doofus

Mitt Romney is catching a lot of flack from his own side now, which seems premature; although the odds are now against him, this is by no means over. But let me say that even if he does spend election night weeping in his car elevator, his critics from the right are being unfair. Yes, he’s a pretty bad candidate — but the core problem is with his party, not with him.

What, after all, does Romney have to run on? True, he hasn’t offered specifics on his economic policies — but that’s because he can’t. The party base demands tax cuts, but also demands that he pose as a deficit hawk; he can’t do both in any coherent fashion without savaging Medicare and Social Security, yet he’s actually trying to run on the claim thatObama is the threat to Medicare. On fiscal matters, doubletalk and obfuscation are his only options.

And no, Paul Ryan didn’t show that it can be done differently. His plan was, as I’ve documented many times, a fraud. Furthermore, he’s basically a Beltway creation; the Ryan legend was based on the desire of Washington type to anoint a Serious, Honest Conservative; expose him to the wider scene, and it all falls apart.

Nor can Romney do the Bush thing of running as America’s defender against gay married terrorists.

First of all, that old standby, national security, isn’t working; between Bush’s Iraq debacle and the fact that Obama was the one who got Bin Laden, the notion that only the GOP will defend America is dead for the foreseeable future. And at this point social issues are cutting the wrong way: there are almost surely more affluent women who will vote against the party of Todd Akin than there are white working-class voters who will punish the Dems for gay marriage.

And underlying it all is the diminishing whiteness of the American electorate.

This still might be a close election thanks to the weakness of the economy, and a better candidate than Romney might have had a better chance of pulling it off. But the long-term fundamentals are not good for Republicans.

93 pages?

Damn...I think "The Alice '65" is gonna be 120+ pages long, because I still have some filling in to do between scenes. But I have the ending written as well as most of the first half, and I'm not holding back on anything, right now. I probably have some repetition I can get rid of, and a touch of condensing that could occur; I just refuse to do that until I have a first draft finished.

When I adapted Beryl Markham's story, "Straight On Till Morning" and "West With the Night", into a script, my first draft was 167 pages long. My second draft -- 134 pages. That one got me Best Adapted Screenplay at Worldfest Houston, far too many years ago. And once I cleaned up my style, it dropped by another 10. Now? I could probably cut out another 5 pages.

One problem I have in sending out some of my earlier work is it's in this old style, where I was far too detailed and specific about things. I still tend towards that, but I'm a lot better than I used to be.

Something I am focusing on is working the theme of the script into the first draft so I can elaborate on it...hopefully in ways that won't be too obvious until Adam's revelation near the end.

I think my inspiration for this is Charlie Chaplin's "City Lights". The movie is funny all the way through, with a strong sense of sentimentality that almost but doesn't quite overpower the comedy. Until the end. When you realize the whole film's been setting you up for moment of absolute truth that is absolutely heartbreaking. It was one of my top five favorite films for years, and is still in the top ten.

So...now I'm checking out other movies that might be along the same lines. Tonight I watched "Love, Actually" and it was nice. Very clean and neat, but that's all it wanted to be. I will say, I laughed out loud when I saw Billy Bob Thornton appear as the US President; he was too perfect...and while I think he was supposed to be a Bill Clinton clone, he had Bush II down pat. Too bad Hugh Grant wasn't Prime Minister when Bush was working to get Tony Blair to back invading Iraq...and I did like his little dance.

But it had nothing in it like my A65. Next? "Notting Hill", in which Hugh Grant is a bookshop owner and Julia Roberts is a famous actress. THAT one...I'm nervous about.

This is Adam...

September 22, 2012

I found the heart of "Alice..." and I'm still a little shaky from it. I don't know if I can get away with this...but I reached for an answer...and touched something that...that is beyond words.

Jesus...I wonder if I believe in God, again?

You never know...

...where inspiration will come from.

I happened on this picture while surfing the web...and it made me laugh, out loud. Because it gave me a way to make the ending of "The Alice '65" work as comedy. I was planning to have a Russian bad guy and an Australian mix in at the end and make it all freaky and suspenseful and off-beat in its action...which is NOT the direction the story wanted to go and was letting me know it by refusing to move...but now it's going to be very off the wall and still caught in reality to the point of (hopefully) laugh-out-loud.

It came at just the right time, too. I was pretty down.

You see, over the last year I've been entering Find Ray T into various screenplay competitions, and out of 20 entries (at no small cost in fees, I might add) it made finalist in 2 of them. The rest? Zero. Zip. Nada. Not even Quarterfinalist. Yesterday, I had another one let me know it'd been shut out, again.

FRT is probably the most commercial, Syd Field style script I've ever written. Covers all the bases. Hits all the plot points. And does it in a way that I like. I seriously do like the script and story. But even when I send it out to producers looking for something just like it (I get leads from InkTip, ISA, LinkedIn, ScreenwritingU, Mandy, a friend of mine, and a few others) it's always, "Not what we're looking for."

I've come close to giving up on screenwriting so many times. Even told myself it's silly. Hell, proclaimed it from the mountaintops! But I keep doing it, and I'm doing it, again, with A65. I guess I'll keep going till I'm dead. Must be my own brand of psychosis.

But the fact is, as much as I enjoyed (and hated and moaned about) the process of making "The Lyons' Den" into a book, I think of my stories in script form, first. And I doubt I'll change. Hell, if A65 works out to be funny enough, I may revisit some old scripts and rework them. I dunno.

I just know that's what's keeping me going.

Complete the Orisi

The rest of the bit with Adam getting made over...
__________________
Adam is plopped in a chair, then the Crew dives in.

They work on his fingernails...

And his toenails...

And cutting and styling his hair.

A cleansing mask is smoothed onto his face.

A woman tries various colognes on him by touching some to his skin and sniffing in a way that is both invasive and sensual.

ADAM
...Careful...

He drinks some wine.

Orisi appears with a leather shopping bag.

ORISI
Here. Perfect!

He pulls out a pair of briefs. Adam jolts.

ADAM
Pink y-fronts? You’re joking!

ORISI
This is the color of Salmon! An Orisi Man does NOT wear pink!

ADAM
What’s so bloody wrong with what I had on? I took a bath before I got on the plane, you know, and I do wear deodorant!

ORISI
Mr. Verlain -- an Orisi Man dresses from the skin out. Not socks, but hosiery of finest blended wool. Not Y-fronts, but underwear made from purest cotton, in Egypt, with a thread count of twelve-hundred. He does not wear briefs. And deodorant is never his cologne.

ADAM
CASEY, this is gettin’ to be -- !

CASEY (O.S.)
Adam, just wear the fucking briefs! It’s not like anybody’s gonna see ‘em. And hurry up; the car’s gonna be here in half an hour.

Orisi coldly offers Adam the briefs. Adam almost snarls then snatches them.

ADAM
What I bloody do for a bloody book.

INT. CASEY’S HOME - DAY

Patricia makes a Bloody Mary as Casey paces. She’s not dressed, yet.

CASEY
Adam, you ready, already?

ORISI (O.S.)
Stand back.

Orisi and his crew come out of the bedroom, exhausted.

ORISI (cont’d)
Casey...do you know the scene in My Fair Lady, when they give to Eliza Doolitle a bath? And she goes from being the slug to being the lovely butterfly? Expect less. Much less. Oh, and vodka, for all.

His crew nods.

ORISI (cont’d)
Adam! Come!

Adam huffs out...and he looks fantastic in an elegant Tuxedo, nails polished, hair gelled, Italian loafers on his feet. Even the bandage on his eye looks cool.

ADAM
Was this really necessary? I mean, they even gave me a bloody pedicure, and I’ve never had one of those.

ORISI
Obviously.

ADAM
Yeah, yeah, yeah -- well, now my feet feel funny.

Casey just smiles. Patricia sets down her drink.

PATRICIA
Adam, honey, have you seen yourself?

ORISI
An Orisi Man does not need to see himself. He knows how he looks.

ADAM
There’s no mirrors in that room.

PATRICIA
There’s one by the door.

Adam goes to it...and is taken aback.

ADAM
Bloody hell.

CASEY
No shit.

She takes a photo of him, using her cell phone. Orisi gasps.

ORISI
Why do you take the photo?

CASEY
Send to his boss.

ADAM
Oh, Casey -- not to Vincent.

CASEY
Too late. Done.

ADAM
Oh, Christ, I’m never going to hear the end of it.

A CAR HORN sounds, outside. Adam realizes -- .

ADAM (cont’d)
Casey -- you’re not ready?

CASEY
Mom, give the Orisi’s their drinks. Adam, step outside.

She runs upstairs.

ORISI
Casey, you show the photo to anyone else, I sue you for slander!

PATRICIA
Oh, shut up.

She hands out shots. Adam gets his pants and pulls out his wallet and passport. Orisi tries to grab them from him.

ORISI
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, an Orisi Man does not carry a wallet!

ADAM
Well, this one bloody does, and if you don’t bloody like it you can bloody kiss my arse!

The crew is horrified. Orisi looks Adam up one side and down the other...then smiles.

ORISI
Well...maybe there still is hope for you.

Adam huffs and storms outside.

Bring on the Orisi!

Adam's been coerced into escorting Casey to a movie premier and party...but he has to look good. After all, this IS Hollywood.

______________________________

INT. CASEY’S HOME - DAY

A well-dressed man, ORISI, circles Adam, eyeing him very critically. A couple of Bandaids are over Adam’s cut. Casey takes notes.

ORISI
Something to do about the hair. And the fingernails! Do you exfoliate?

ADAM
I don’t even know what that is.

ORISI
God! He must shave. Not enough to call it scruff. And your skin! Oh...

He whips out a tape measure.

ORISI (cont’d)
Down the pants.

ADAM
Excuse me?

ORISI
I need your hips, legs, and rear. See what I have to work with.

Patricia enters with plane tickets.

PATRICIA
Ticket’s changed. I never get to go First Class.

CASEY
You get to go to the store. Here’s a list.

ORISI
PANTS please!

ADAM
I don’t understand -- why can’t I just try some things on?

ORISI
At Orisi’s we do not try things on. We are not Sears. Drop pants.

CASEY
Adam, c’mon, it’s not that big a deal.

PATRICIA
Maybe that’s what he’s afraid you’ll find out.

Adam huffs, undoes his pants and lowers them down his hips. Orisi yanks them to his knees.

ADAM
Oy!

ORISI
Mother of God -- what is this you wear!?

ADAM
What, what, what? My briefs?

ORISI
Oh, Casey, Casey -- Orisi needs backup.

He pulls out his cell phone.

Patricia smiles at Adam.

PATRICIA (cont’d)
So, honey, white wine or red? Trust me -- it helps.

ADAM
-- Red. And maybe you better leave the bottle.

PATRICIA
That's a given.

INT. CASEY’S BATHROOM - DAY

Big, bright and beautiful. Adam showers in the latest fashion of water spritzers. Steam billows.

Orisi enters with bottles of shampoo, soap, conditioner, skin treatment, shower scrubber...you name it.

ORISI
What is this steam? An Orisi man does not need the steam. We are not prunes!

He reaches into the shower and turns down the hot.

ADAM
Oy!

ORISI
Use these to bathe!

He shoves the bottles at Adam.

ADAM
I’ve got soap!

ORISI
Soap? SOAP? What kind of philistine are you!? Soap.

He storms out.

Adam smells the bottles.

ADAM
Pomegranate? Are you joking?

INT. CASEY’S BEDROOM - DAY

Big, bright, and beautiful, with a grand view of the ocean. Adam stands before them, drinking wine from the bottle. He wears only a robe.

Orisi circles him as his CREW awaits instructions.

ORISI
We start from nothing. Face. Hair. Nails. Toes. Build them.

He yanks the robe open to reveal Adam’s chest.

ADAM
Oy, oy, oy, oy!

ORISI
See? No need to wax.

He whips the robe closed again, then claps his hand.

ORISI (cont’d)
Go, go, go people. We must make the Orisi Man from this lump of clay, and at once!

Adam is shoved into a chair and the Crew dives in.

I should never make plans

The second I do, something screws them up. Today, I was going to leave work a bit early, pick up my mail, get to work on A65 by 7, after dinner...and instead I worked late and got damn little else done. Seems a shipment that I wasn't even involved with had the wrong paperwork, and I spent from 3:30 to 5:30 scrambling to get the right paperwork into the airline in time for the package to make its flight. Made it by 5:29...but my brain was mush.

I still managed to go over 10 pages of A65 and added in a couple scenes where the story felt lacking. Once I did that, I shifted half the info in one scene to the two of them and started building a theme of people who are trapped, whether by their own design or the design of others. And how they break free.

Adam's life was set up by himself. He's a bit cloistered, doesn't drive, can't swim, and books are his life. He's closed off the real world and is turning into a fuddy-duddy before he's even 30.

Casey's a lot stronger and not willing to take the bullshit people hand out. She's also controlling and selfish and used to being used. That Adam doesn't use her starts her thinking maybe she's trapped herself into a version of life that doesn't really suit her.

Lando is trapped by his ambition and need.

And yet...it's still funny. I think. to set things up a bit better, I used the old trope of someone trapped in a car as the driver whips in and out of traffic on the PCH like it's a speedway...like Hitchcock's done a couple times. Steal from the best, I say...and that way the info gets out while you're having fun at the passenger's expense.

I hope. Won't know till the whole script's done and I'm ready to get feedback.

Now comes the hard part

I spent the day working on my step outline for A65 and doing a bit more research to make certain I'm not throwing in anything that's completely out of left field. It's now 14 pages of beats, notes, and ideas. I've deliberately forced myself to not allow anything into the story that does not grow organically from the characters, location, or situation, and does not have an emotional connection to the story. That hasn't been easy.

What's going to be harder is sitting down to write it, because while I can hear it and see it in my head, something always gets lost in the translation to the printed word and I have to fight to make it show up there.

Like the opening. I worked on that today, adding in a bit more prologue to set Adam up...and suddenly it's reading flat. I have a feeling it's because I've got him mooning over a woman he works with, Elizabeth, who isn't the least bit interested back...and I took out a bit of his pissiness. So I've reworked it, again...and again...and it's a bit better.

What I'm trying to avoid is comedy that only stems from shock value and comes just for a laugh's sake. There was a lot of that in "The Hangover" and too many times reality went out the window in chase of a laugh. Like the whole tasering bit in the police station. 1. I don't find tasering people to be funny and 2. it was completely contrary to what the cops would actually do. Especially with kids watching. There were a hundred better ways to work the whole arrest sequence.

Plus, how could ANYONE get a fully grown tiger past the security in a Las Vegas casino and up to a hotel room?? Those things are more tightly watched than the Pentagon during Defcon Four.

Crap like that kept taking me out of the movie, and it was a consistent thing. Yes, I'd laugh, but the second I put any logic to the story, I'd go, WTF? That's what I like so much about "His Girl Friday" and "Ball of Fire". Their comedy comes from the characters and the situations, all of which make sense. They're grounded in the real world even as the situations are a bit over the top. I want A65 to be the same kind of funny.

Yeah, make things easy for yourself.

Party scene...

Long day, and now I'm dealing with the lovely re-tasting of some god-awful spring rolls at Baltimore's Airport, so I'm just posting something I polished up. Casey takes Adam to Lando's party at his home in Beverly Hills after the movie premier. Still needs work...but it's a start.
---------------------------
INT. LANDO’S HOME - NIGHT

Adam sees Casey sneaking upstairs so focuses on Lando.

ADAM
Good film, tonight, Lando. You and Casey seemed to have true chemistry on-screen.

LANDO
(Australian)
Yeah, chemistry used to be our middle name. I thought you didn’t get to see the show.

ADAM
I...um...slipped in when the guards weren’t looking.

LANDO
Cool.

He starts away but Adam steps in front of him.

ADAM
You were in Ilithium Four, weren’t you? Very interesting film.

LANDO
You saw I-Four?

ADAM
Oh, yes. Loved the book so had to see what was done to...um, with it. Your take on Leopard was...rather unusual.

LANDO
(smiles)
Yeah, they cut out half my lines, but it made a shitload of cash, and it bumped my price up. Now I can dump this place and get something livable.

ADAM
You don’t like it here?

LANDO
It’s a money pit. I got talked into it by my manager. Taxes and crap. But it’s too open. People can find me. I want something up one of the canyons, y’know. Hidden. Even with directions you get lost. That kind of place.

ADAM
Your own cloistered world, eh?

LANDO
Like what you got.

ADAM
Excuse me?

LANDO
Casey said you work with old books someplace in London.

ADAM
Um...yes. Shocking we...um, we’re together, isn’t it?

LANDO
Naw, that’s exactly what I’d expect.

ADAM
Excuse me?

LANDO
Oh...she didn’t tell you why she dumped me, did she?

ADAM
I...I hadn’t asked.

LANDO
It’s ‘cause I started making more money than her. She likes guys she can look down on. Control. When we hooked up, I was on a soap and she was makin’ ten times more 'n me. Then came I-Four and this movie and I got the boot. Word of advice -- when she finally dumps you, don’t get caught dating anybody else till she’s hooked up with a new guy. It’s insulting.

ANGELINA, a gorgeous actress, comes up and hangs on Lando.

ANGELINA
Baby, this is a deadly party.

LANDO
No, shit.
(to Adam)
Remember her?

ADAM
Oh, my god -- you were the Seeress in Ilithium-Four.

ANGELINA
You...saw that movie?

(to Lando)

Doesn't look like a geek

LANDO
Read the book, too.

ANGELINA
Shit, he is one.

(to Adam)

You’re not gonna bitch me out for going topless, are you?

ADAM
-- No. No.

LANDO
Tell you what, baby -- you’re all about goin’ to England, some day, right? Andrew’s from there; talk to him.

ADAM
Adam.

Lando shrugs and heads away. Angelina keeps Adam distracted.

ANGELINA
Andrew Adam. Nice. I’m Angelina.

ADAM
I’m just Adam.

ANGELINA
Wow, you even sound like you’re from England. So what do you do, over there?

ADAM
I -- I’m with a university.

ANGELINA
Oh. Why do you all drive on the wrong side of the road?

Adam sees Lando headed up the stairs.

ADAM
We don’t; we drive on the right. Um, what’s on the first floor?

ANGELINA
What you see. Living room, dining -- .

ADAM
Um, right -- second floor, then.

ANGELINA
Oh, yeah, somebody told me you English guys call the second floor the first floor, which is weird, because where’s the second one?

ADAM
That becomes the third.

ANGELINA
Really? Weird. Now what exactly is a crumpet?

ADAM
An English muffin. Excuse me.

He starts for the stairs but is stopped by a massive guard in a black suit, TITO.

TITO
Upstairs is off-limits.

ADAM
But the girl I came with -- Casey -- my date went up there.

TITO
Only Mr. Grissom’s allowed up there.

LANDO (O.S.)
What is it, Tito?

Lando is at the top of the stairs.

TITO
He was tryin’ to go upstairs, boss.

LANDO
He wasn't invited. Why’s he here?

Tito nods and whistles. TWO OTHER GUARDS appear and rush Adam to the front door.

ADAM
Wait, I came with Casey! You saw me come in with her! She introduced us! What the bloody hell is going on?

He sees Lando smirk after him just before he is tossed outside.

Productive...

I finished a step outline for "The Alice '65" today. Thirty four beats or moments linked together in a somewhat straight line, letting both Adam and Casey evolve in their own ways.

 Looks like I'm locked into Russell Tovey as Adam, especially because of his ears and slightly freaked-out expression. He's played a werewolf on "Being Human", so I figure he can handle a manuscript researcher who's in way over his head with a Hollywood Actress...and I do mean that in caps.

I finally found Casey -- Eliza Dushku. She played Faith on "Buffy..." and came damn close to stealing the whole show from Sarah Michelle Gellar. Favorite line of hers from that show? "I've had my share of losers, but, you - you boinked the undead." Directed at Buffy.

And Ryan Kwanten would be fun as Lando. He's pretty and full of himself and built like a brick shithouse, to use an old Texas phrase. I could see him owning a black panther in Beverly Hills, and finding out who he needed to schmooze to get a permit for it.

And we can't forget Gertrude, the black panther (which according to my research is nonexistent; they're really melanistic Jaguars, leopards, or cougars...but none of that sounds fun). She's got an emotional stake in the story, too.

Interesting that I've chosen actors from shows that all have (or had) werewolves in them. Wonder what that means...?

Damn, I'm having fun.

Counter-counter-revolutionary

Not all Muslims are happy about what happened in Libya and Egypt, but for some reason it takes FaceBook to show this.

15 Photos of Libyans apologizing for the violence.

19 More Photos of Libyans apologizing for the violence.

But do you think the right-wing-freaks and Tea Party scum will care? This was deliberately started by a couple of anti-Islam assholes who now say, "Hey, it's not my fault." Which is bullshit. If you spit in someone's face, you shouldn't be surprised if they slap you back. And that's just what the scum who made that film...and who burned a Koran (AKA: Terry Jones, worshiper of the devil)...did. The blood of 4 Americans and God knows how many Libyans is on their hands, and Fox News is on their side.

I already despised Sean Hannity and Ann Coulter. Now I'm ashamed that they are Americans.

Classic moment...

This is the area where I picked up a library. I kept looking for Cary Grant and that crop-duster plane.

You don't know flat land till you've seen the Texas Panhandle. It makes a straight line look squiggly in comparison. You can see rain coming from 100 miles away, and Plainview has more tall grain silos than it does people, almost. And boring to drive? God.

But then I hit Dallas and got reminded of how big cities suck when it comes to cars. Apparently they're rebuilding the whole northern end of Loop 635 -- I mean it is ALL torn up, on both directions -- and, of course, that's exactly the route I had to take. Took me 2 hours to go ten miles. That's even slower than LA in rush hour.

Which is why I do not commute. I am not a good urban dweller in that respect. I'd rather spend more for an apartment close to work than deal with traffic and such. I don't even like it all that much on the subway in NYC.

Oh, well...at least my hotel has an In-N-Out burger joint close by.

This is Las Vegas?

I changed planes in Vegas, today, and have to say, flat out -- that airport is pathetic. Granted, Southwest  is in the older section and some construction was going on...but just 3 places to eat? Sbarro's, Burger King, and some mexican-food place that doesn't offer plain enchiladas? But they got 6000 slot machines, fer damn sure.

I've changed planes in that place, before, but I guess because I never had to deal with lunch, I never paid attention. If I was a city thought of as glitzy and glamorous, I'd want the airport to reflect that. But then...when I went to Honolulu to meet a great aunt of mine for the first time, that airport was like something out of Siberia. Not at all welcoming.

Of course, Lubbock's wasn't great -- it only has 7 or 8 gates and two whole luggage carousels -- but it's a small city, maybe 200K in population. Everyone who flies out of here gets shuffled off to Dallas or Phoenix for their connections.

BTW, Penske Trucks is just as screwy as U-Haul. I reserved a 12 foot truck for today; I got 2 calls confirming it; but when I got to the truck rental location...they didn't have one. No location in Lubbock had one. I'm now driving a 16 foot behemoth that makes me nervous and will be hard to load. But it was that or nothing, and I have to pick this shipment up tomorrow. So...

I'd like to think these are aberrations, but I'm finding more and more nonsense like this is happening. And it's not just with businesses. It's education, too. I had dinner with my nephew who teaches architecture at Texas Tech, and he told me the first essays from his freshman undergraduates were unreadable. And his wife, who's doing her Masters in literature with a focus on manuscripts, told me of a lecture a PhD in Lit gave where she consistently used "magnanimous" incorrectly throughout her speech. It's thought she meant "magnificent." And another friend told me of a guy who just graduated college who didn't know the correct meaning of "detrimental"; he thought it was a positive description.

And no, English was not their second language; that would be understandable.

All of a sudden, I don't feel as stupid as I usually think I am. 

No time...

Rushing off to Lubbock, Texas to pick up a library and take it to Dallas. All happened today, so I've been scrambling to get ready...and hope I've got everything.

Wish I was goin' here, instead. But I'll get back. And soon.

Final version of scene for class

This is what I submitted for the comedy class. I'm trying to combine "fish out of water" with "incongruent pairings" for the plot, using misinterpretation, comedic surprise, wildly inappropriate response, embarrassment,comedic tragedy...and the whole story is one of forced union of incompatibles.

Set-up -- Adam is being forced by Casey to accompany her to Lando's party. He's her ex-boyfriend and has the Alice '65...though he doesn't know it. Adam was dressed by a Rodeo Drive dude named Orisi, who insisted he wear Orisi's own brand of briefs...as well as a $5000 tuxedo. Lando has Adam thrown out of the party so he's climbed through a neighbor's trees to get into the back yard and find Casey, thinking she's in trouble. The fence looks more like a zoo enclosure.

And I'm back to thinking Russell Tovey would be perfect for the role.
-----------------------------
EXT. LANDO’S BACK YARD - NIGHT

Adam rests in the crook of a tree and checks the tear. Oh, dear. Adam carefully looks around.

The arched fence runs from one end of the house around the wall to the other end. The party is visible inside.

ADAM
(mutters)
No one outside?

GUARD (O.S.)
Somebody up there?

A flashlight beam dances through the leaves. Adam grimaces and then MEOWS like a cat...sort of.

GUARD (O.S.) (cont’d)
Hey, kitty cat, you don’t wanna be near that yard, trust me.

Adam MEOWS a question mark...and it starts to rain. He rolls his eyes and MEOWS, angrily.

He does not notice a big, black, curious PANTHER strolling up to gaze into the tree. What he does see is --

Casey and Lando kissing inside the house.

ADAM
Bloody hell.

GUARD (O.S.)
Okay, that wasn’t no fuckin’ cat! Boss, we got an intruder in the back yard.

TITO’S VOICE ON WALKIE-TALKING
(laughing)
Don’t worry, he’ll come out soon as he meets Gertrude.

GUARD (O.S.)
Don’t we want him alive?

Alive? What’s he mean? The panther softly growls. Adam looks around. He pulls out his glasses, puts them on and sees --

Gertrude as she ROARS.

ADAM
Oh, bloody hell, it IS a zoo!

Gertrude jumps at him, ripping the seat of his pants and cutting his butt! He scrambles up the fence, loses his grip and falls -- and his cummerbund catches on a wire.

ADAM (cont’d)
SCHEISSE!

Gertrude cocks her head.

Adam jostles back -- and the cummerbund snaps and he drops into the pool!

Gertrude watches.

Adam paddles and sinks in the middle of the deep end.

ADAM (cont’d)
Help! Can’t! Swim!

GUESTS bolt to the windows but stay inside. Lando comes out, followed by Casey. He stays under the porch awning as she grabs an umbrella.

LANDO
Shit, look what the cat dragged in!

CASEY
Lando, help him!

LANDO
It’s not that deep.

CASEY
It’s deep enough, idiot!

She takes a pool net and grabs Adam’s head with it. He almost pulls her in, so she pushes him to the shallow end.

Angelina comes out to be with Lando.

ANGELINA
Now that’s the way to make a party lively, Landy-baby.

Casey’s eyes shoots daggers at her. Gertrude growls.

Finally, Adam can stand up, but he’s tangled in the net, coughing and choking. The Tux’s pants are down around his hips, exposing those briefs.

Gertrude watches, fascinated.

LANDO
(calls into house)
Hey, everybody, you can tell he’s English. He wears pink panties.

ADAM
They’re...SALMON...colored! Where’re my glasses?

He finds half of the frame, snapped perfectly in the center. He puts it on to see Gertrude has the other half and is playing with it.

CASEY
Adam, come on out; she won’t hurt you.

LANDO
I dunno, his butt looks a lot like salmon patties.

Adam heads for the steps.

ADAM
Tell me, Lando, what’s it like to be named after a character in a science fiction movie? A great one, admittedly, but not even a primary character, merely a secondary one. Did your mum and da think so little of you, even then?

LANDO
The way your ass is bleeding, your mum and da won’t find any of you if you get out of that pool. Gertrude likes her steak tartare.

Adam notices Gertrude is pacing him, the other half of his glasses over one eye. He stays.

CASEY
Lando, cut it out. Send her away, already. Adam, are you all right?

ADAM
Oh...peachy. I was wondering what I’d do for a bath, tonight, though I seriously doubt Orisi will want his outfit back.

CASEY
Don’t worry about that. Dammit, Lando, send Gertrude to her cage!

LANDO
Naw, let her chase him around a little. She likes the exercise.

ANGELINA
Which side of the road do you run on, Andrew?

ADAM
It’s ADAM!

CASEY
Gertrude. House. HOUSE!

Gertrude looks at Casey, drops the half-glasses and sulks away.

Lando steps forward.

LANDO
Gertrude...wasser.

Gertrude looks at him then slides into the pool with a happy little growl.

Adam is out of the pool in nothing flat. He has to hold his pants up. The cut by his eye is bleeding, again...and he’s missing a shoe; it’s at the bottom of the deep end.

Casey dabs at the cut with his shirt collar.

ADAM
You knew about Gertrude?

CASEY
Yeah, he’s had her for years. What’re you doing here? I saw you leave.

ADAM
-- I thought I forgot something. My mistake.

He rounds the pool to pick up the mangled other half of his glasses and puts it on, with the other lens. Very cock-eyed.

He storms to the house then stops and spins.

ADAM (cont’d)
No -- no mistake.

ANGELINA
What DID you forget?

LANDO

His brain.

ADAM
Lando, you should never try to speak without a script. It only reveals the limitations of your capacity to use the English language.

He returns to the tree, climbs up, and grabs the jacket. Gertrude watches him from the pool. Casey has disappeared.

LANDO
Hey, Adam, I didn’t know you could climb so good. Beef up a little, add an inch or two to your chin, I could use you as a double.

Adam drops back to the ground.

ADAM
Thanks, but I’ve already played the ass, once, tonight. That’s quite enough for a lifetime.

LANDO
Yeah, you were really -- whoa, what?

ANGELINA
Huh?

ADAM
Christ, y’know, fungus has more intelligence than the two of you, combined.

He storms to the house, dripping all the way.

ADAM (cont’d)
Step away from the madman!

The guests do. He heads out.

Gertrude eyes the opening in the fence.

Respite

Still working on the final version of the scene I'm working on for my final day of the class. I'm doing the bit where Adam sneaks into Lando's back yard, trying to find Casey, only to find out that Lando has a black female panther corralled in. I'll post it, tomorrow.

In the meantime...

This is the upper Hudson River Valley, looking south, near Bear Mountain Bridge (which I couldn't get a decent photo of). The lower left quarter has the train tracks that the 20th Century Limited used to follow, as in the whole train sequence in "North By Northwest." That's the route I go when I ride the train between Buffalo and NYC...and will be in December. That should be fun.

I stopped in Rochester to get some barbecue sauce as a birthday present for a co-worker. She likes this place downtown called Dinosaur. You can see it to the very right of the white building; it's that little red and brown structure and used to be a train depot, as I understand.

The white building is the public library, and the arches are part of a bridge from one side of downtown to another. This is the first time I've actually investigated that bridge...and here's the interior.

It used to be a subway, and above it was the Erie Canal before it was rerouted away from downtown Rochester. Since the river's so shallow, here, they used a bridge for the canal boats, for a while. The drawings and photos actually look very impressive.

The subway disappeared into these nice spooky tunnels. Gives me lots of ideas for horror stories, ghost stories, that sort of thing. They even echo.

This should be readable, if you blow it up. It explains everything, every neatly, and has nice images.

I should go exploring like this, more often. You never know what you'll find.

Rewrite of an earlier posted scene

Trying to add to the comedy...or laughs...or something. Again, this is after Adam's been humiliated in front of Lando's guests. His pants are torn and his butt is scratched. His glasses broke in half. He's sopping wet from falling in the pool. And he's missing a shoe.
------------------------
EXT. BEVERLY HILLS MANSION — NIGHT

Adam storms down the street. Casey hurries after him with an umbrella. It still rains.

ADAM
You bloody set me up!

CASEY
I didn’t have any choice! It was the only way I could think of to get the book back.

ADAM
You mean, use me to make your ex-side of beef jealous and -- ! Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait,!

He spins on her, horrified, splashing water and blood on her.

CASEY
Watch it!

ADAM
You don’t have it? You don’t have the book?!

CASEY
I...I told you —- it’s in a safety deposit box and -- .

ADAM
Oh, don’t tell me it’s Lando’s.

CASEY
Okay, yeah, it’s his box. When I found out how valuable the book is, I put it there to keep it safe. But then I caught him fucking Angelina Castroini so smeared his Ferrari with dogshit, and for some reason that pissed him off, even though I was the one being cheated on -- .

Adam groans and continues down to Santa Monica Blvd.

ADAM
I don’t believe it. I can’t believe it. How will I explain this to Vincent? All I had to do was fly to Los Angeles to pick up a book...but I’ve ruined everything. And what’s worse? An Alice Sixty-five, perhaps only the tenth copy known to be in existence, is in the hands of that...that Neanderthal...no! No! No! Not even that advanced, that Tautavel man who probably thinks it a printed form of toilet paper! If he even knows how to wipe!

CASEY
What’re you so upset about? It’s my book.

ADAM
No, Casey, it was your bloody grandfather’s book! Why he gave it to you, I have no idea, because you have zero appreciation for it. You don’t care about anything but yourself! What’s going to hurt you; what’s going to help you; and to hell what helps or hurts other people.

CASEY
Adam!

ADAM
Don’t you understand? I will lose my position at the university. Does that permeate through any part of your being? I will be blamed for not bringing the Alice Sixty-five into our collection. Me. Because of this.

He picks at his glasses and then his pants.

ADAM (cont’d)
And this. It’s not something a serious person does. It’s not something a person who can be trusted does.

CASEY
Adam, you're too young to be one of those.

ADAM
Well, I'm bloody well old enough to know that I'm standing in the middle of the street, dripping wet after nearly drowning, because a girl I trusted couldn't be!

They reach a bus stop just as a bus is about to pull away. Adam slams on the door.

ADAM (cont’d)
No, wait, please! Please!

The bus opens its door.

CASEY
Adam, cut it! Let’s go back to the house and I’ll get my car and take you to a hotel.

ADAM
No, you stay away from me. Just stay away and I’ll make my own way home, thank you.
(to bus driver)
Excuse me, which way am I going?

BUS DRIVER
You don’t know?

ADAM
I haven’t since I arrived.

CASEY
Come on. Your butt’s bleeding. Let me take you home.

ADAM
No.

BUS DRIVER
We’re headed for Santa Monica.

ADAM
Can I get to the airport from there?

CASEY
Please, I’ll fix you up and get you back in your old clothes.

ADAM
No.

BUS DRIVER
Yeah.

ADAM
Excellent.

CASEY
I’ll even buy you new ones. I know where there’s a twenty-four hour Target, and you’re the only person I’d ever admit that to.

He pulls out his wallet. Water dribbles from it as he peels off two very wet dollar bills.

ADAM
Do you take cold wet cash?

BUS DRIVER
If the bills’ll go in.

CASEY
Adam, cut it. Please. Why won’t you let me help you?

ADAM
Because, Casey, you bloody well annoy me.

The bus door closes and it takes off. She holds up a gleaming object...

CASEY
But I...I got Lando’s key.

The bus stops and Adam gets off to stand in the rain. Casey runs over to him.

CASEY (cont’d)
You changed your mind!

ADAM
The bills wouldn’t go in.

She shows him the key. He looks at her.

ADAM (cont’d)
For the safety deposit box?

She nods.

ADAM (cont’d)
Can you get to it without Lando being there?

CASEY
I’m authorized.

ADAM
(finally)
Where’s that Target?

(BTW...suggestions on amping up the funny will be most appreciated.)