Derry, Northern Ireland

Derry, Northern Ireland
A book I'm working on is set in this town.

Monday, February 17, 2014

UG is taking over

I worked on Tawfiq's character...and Dev's, in the same section. They're turning into an interesting pair, where even though Tawfi's younger than Dev, he's much more honest and aware of the reality of the world. I don't mean just the political reality or societal, his knowledge is of human beings and what they truly are. He's also developed a sense of entitlement that I find surprising. Guess that's endemic to being a rich little bastard.

The contrast is against Dev's self-certainty that he knows the world...and is finding out it's limited by his very American viewpoints. Aspects of himself he thinks he's above. Reg hasn't factored into anything much, yet, except as someone innocent and on the right side. Guess we'll see what happens with him.

I'm still waiting to get FCB finished. I contacted the company that sold me a program that converts pdfs to epubs and they are supposedly looking into why Lightning Spark is saying the file I tried to upload has errors. It's supposed to be set to go. Something that makes me leery of these guys is, I tried to e-mail the epub file I'd done to them to see for themselves...and it bounced back 3 times; seems the size of it exceeds their ability to accept attachments.

As regards the latest twerp who's quoting the Bible's "kill the gays" passage at me, he said he didn't mean me and then proceeded to explain that no one has the right to cast stones at anyone's sinfulness because none of us is without sin. It's obvious he thought he was making things better, but in reality he made them worse. Because what he's saying to me now is, the way I was born is a sin. I've always been gay. I even used to play dress up when I was 4 years old, putting on this old cotton skirt of my grandmother's and swishing around like Scarlett O'Hara in Gone With the Wind. But me being gay is a sin, like it's something I chose.

Yeah, right, when I was 12 years old (the age I finally saw I wasn't like other boys) I sat myself down, wondered what is the one thing that would pit me against God, society and my family and chose to be that way. Sure. Makes one hell of a lot of sense.

Look, if you need God and the Bible to make it through the day, I got no problem with that. But to use that to spit on people like me? Than we got a problem. I used to take it because I didn't know any better. I had ministers and members of my family and cops telling me I was wrong because of how I was born. Like having red hair is a sin, and it's taken me too fucking long to get past that for me to sit back and accept it, any more.

I am what I am and it's not a sin to be who I am, and if you don't like it, fuck off.

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