Derry, Northern Ireland

Derry, Northern Ireland
A book I'm working on is set in this town.

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

This is the new face of Dracula?

Jonathan Rhys-Meyers!? Just kill me now.

I first saw this man in a TV remake of "The Magnificent Ambersons" and he was so bad and so shallow and so irritating and childish and every other thing you can think of along the same lines, I refused to watch the rest of the program. Unfortunately, I didn't do so in time to prevent my brain from being scarred by the image of him eating something in a way that could show a cow how to chew cud while his mother tried to talk to him. It's the first image that jumps to mind when I hear his name.

I've seen him in a couple of other things; he damn near ruined what were, otherwise, decent movies. So now I avoid him. Meaning I never watched "The Tudors" where he was Henry VIII for some god-awful reason. The closest I came was catching a glimpse of Henry Cavill's naked butt while being threatened by the father of a girl he was screwing. Almost made me reconsider, because Henry's got talent and charisma and screen presence to burn and is a hundred times better looking.

See what I mean?

But JRM is cyanide to me. He can't act; he poses and moves his eyebrows and purses his lips, and none of that really changes his one-note expression. Yet a lot of gay men think he's to die for. Why, I have no idea. All I know is, I'd rather see Daisy Duck play Dracula than this poseur.

BUT...this is emblematic of Hollywood, today. Packaging is all that counts, no matter what the project calls for. Sometimes it works -- I can see Hugh Jackman as Jean Valjean in the musical "Les Miz", and Matt Damon turned out to be a great Jason Bourne; it's just, 9 times out of 10 it's crap.

Okay, truth is there's nothing new about it. "Out of Africa" got made because Robert Redford played Denys Finch-Hatton when he was brutally wrong for the part, and Humphrey Bogart making Audrey Hepburn fall for him in "Sabrina" was just plain silly and a bit sick, nor did it work any better with Harrison Ford in Bogie's role...tho' that could have been because the actress laying Sabrina was another one who had nothing on camera and a one-note range.

Of course, it could just be proof of how well the casting couch works. You want me? You want me in your movie. Or you ain't got me.

God, I'm in a bitchy mood.


Queer Heaven said...

Damn! that was a BITCHY post!
To each his own... but I do disagree with you one every one of the "miss casts" you mention.
Oh well, I do enjoy reading your blog every so often!

JamTheCat said...

As I said, I was in a bitchy mood. But even now I think it's a major error in casting. That said, you're right -- to each his own.