...and they go in my books and fill the lives of my characters, and I watch them grow and deepen and become real in their own worlds...so much so I can't imagine them being creations of mine. Their experiences are not part of my history. Their words and deeds are stronger than I am capable of. They become my ideal...my truth...more than my reality ever was.
I think of this because something popped up in OT that made me evaluate the whole story in a different light. The ideal memory of a man. Antony has one because he was involved with an older name named Collier Winston-Royce, AKA: Collie. They were together for months, and Collie stabilized him. His death sent Antony into psychotic revenge mode in RIHC6.
Jake's perfect memory is Dion, even though they were together for only a week ten years earlier. But Dion's adoration gave him a profound sense of self-worth that helped him through his time in prison, and was solidified in a painting by Uncle Owen, which figures into the story more deeply than I thought it could.
This made me wonder if I ever had one. And I don't, not really. Not to their extent. I had friends, still have, some very close, but my one relationship was so disastrous, it literally scarred me...and scared me. Now when someone gets too close, I back away.
So I have to wonder where that idea comes from. It's moments like these where I almost sense something more than just this existence. My mind lets portals open and ideas float in on waves that I knew nothing about, before. It unsettles me...but give me hope that I can do what I need to do to make the story work. Make other stories work.
Just dream...and all else will follow...
I think of this because something popped up in OT that made me evaluate the whole story in a different light. The ideal memory of a man. Antony has one because he was involved with an older name named Collier Winston-Royce, AKA: Collie. They were together for months, and Collie stabilized him. His death sent Antony into psychotic revenge mode in RIHC6.
Jake's perfect memory is Dion, even though they were together for only a week ten years earlier. But Dion's adoration gave him a profound sense of self-worth that helped him through his time in prison, and was solidified in a painting by Uncle Owen, which figures into the story more deeply than I thought it could.
This made me wonder if I ever had one. And I don't, not really. Not to their extent. I had friends, still have, some very close, but my one relationship was so disastrous, it literally scarred me...and scared me. Now when someone gets too close, I back away.
So I have to wonder where that idea comes from. It's moments like these where I almost sense something more than just this existence. My mind lets portals open and ideas float in on waves that I knew nothing about, before. It unsettles me...but give me hope that I can do what I need to do to make the story work. Make other stories work.
Just dream...and all else will follow...
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