Derry, Northern Ireland

Derry, Northern Ireland
A book I'm working on is set in this town.

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Jake...who the hell are you?

In both volumes of Rape in Holding Cell 6, Jake was the most decent guy in the story. Maybe even honorable, because he is who he is and his loyalty is what keeps Tone from causing more damage than he does. Collie, Tone's lover and the man killed in that holding cell, was also decent but he was a victim. Jake ain't.

Which is a weird thing to say, because he was busted on a trumped-up charge, raped and sent to prison, where he served 18 months...and found out the truth of the world. All before he even appears in the first book. He's angry. Hurt. Wounded. Scared. Needy. But brutally aware of how things really work. I cannot even begin to think of him as being a victim.

Oh, he was victimized, but that's not the same thing. He wouldn't let it define him. Instead, Jake fought to regain his equilibrium, something that finally happened when he connected with Antony...and why he wound up being the angel of the book.

But he's drifting back and forth in ...Owen Taylor, between decent and one scary m-fucker. I wonder if half the trouble I've been having with this book is, I don't know what Jake's fighting for. I have it on a superficial level -- Tone's freedom from the mess of Texas "justice" and getting back to their life in Copenhagen, then trying to find out why his uncle disappeared -- but there's something deeper going on. Something even he isn't sure he understands, and that's why he's whipsawing between being an angel and being a manipulative little shit.

What's funny is, I like him as that little shit. He's not just fighting back; he's reclaiming his right to be who he damn well wants. And if you don't like it? Fuck off.

Part of me says I need to reconcile these two aspects of him, while another part thinks that's wrong -- that he should be as bi-polar in his actions as he wants to be.

Holy shit -- Jake's out to be who he is, period. No hiding. No concern for the delicacy of other people's sensibilities. And that's in a world where there's always someone out to tell you how you should think, act, or say, and then scream how offended they are if you don't let them dictate how your life is supposed to be lived. While Antony only thinks that's what he, himself, is doing...Jake is doing it, even with Tone.

I need to pay more attention to the interaction between those two and everybody else. I've missed something...except...

At some point, Jake's going to say, "I was born from snakes."

3 comments:

MAC said...

As always, so fascinating to read about the process that goes on in your mind while writing a novel. It's as if these characters live inside you and are using you to tell their story.

JamTheCat said...

Thanks...and what's fun is how the times have changed -- 50 years ago I'd have been put in a mental institution for some of the things I've posted on my blog. It's nuts.

MAC said...

Well, I have to admit, you do sound a bit nuts. But aren't we all? XOXO