Last night was shit. Didn't sleep well. Up and down. Waking with a neck that was out to kill me, probably thanks to a cold front blowing in. I've got psoriatic arthritis in the left shoulder and neck. Had planned to go out and buy new shoes as well as drop off my invoice to Caladex, but stayed in and grumped my way through the day.
I don't do insomnia. Not part of my repertoire. So on the rare occasions where it hits, I turn into a beast. Don't want to talk to anybody. See anybody. I just want to huddle and be to myself. Eat like shit. Drink too much DPZ. Feel sorry for me and my life.
I halfway wonder if part of this is because Brendan's backing away from an important part of NWFO. He's bitching at me that I imposed it upon him and threatening to...well...I don't know what. He's just being irritating. We're in the middle of draft six, it's been part of every other draft, and he's just now letting me know he's not happy about it?
Meaning I'll have to rewrite an entire chapter and find new motivation for other actions down the line. Just what I needed--more work.
I'm also feeling overwhelmed, financially. Auto insurance has bumped up by 15%. I owe over $1200 in taxes. APoS-Derry isn't selling very well. The world political situation is careening towards catastrophe and chaos. And I'm tired of fighting with amazingly stupid people, online. Not just MAGAts but some progressives who have a black and white view of how things should be. I think I better stop social media, for a while.
Doesn't hurt that I have a crush on David Leon and used him to help me build Joss in The Beast in the Nothing Room. A villain who's not a villain in a story that has an impossible killer who isn't a killer...
I'm really fucking proud of how that story turned out. Patting self on back did a lot to help my aches and pains.
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