Once upon a time...

I bitch and complain and whine about how much rewriting I do and feel the need for, over and over and over. But every now and then I find that I'm missing a great opportunity to make the story better. It's usually something I'd only glossed over in earlier draft. And no matter how many times I come to that realization, sometimes after the book's been published, I keep making that mistake.

For example, in the Beast in the Nothing Room, Finn (the MC) learns he has a fraternal twin who was sold for adoption to a wealthy German couple, at birth. This has only a minimal effect on him, which is nonsensical.

They meet in the course of Finn's investigation of something impossible, find they have a lot in common regarding what's happening, and wind up as lovers. Sort of a sneaky roundabout way of doing some twin-cest.

But one reader pointed out that while they liked the book, they didn't believe that relationship. And thinking about it, I missed a couple of opportunities to deepen their connection and Finn's conflict. Like when they were flying to Reading on a private plane and they have a quick, almost perfunctory conversation about the situation. Necessary, but boring. It could have been a lot more intense.

Something similar happened at the end of Porno Manifesto, where Alec and Joseph wind up together...not because the story was leading to that but just because it made for a nice, quick ending. That is never a good reason for anything in a book.

Well, this time going through NWFO, I found one such moment I'd been paying little attention to...and am rectifying that. It's after Brendan realizes he's something of a prisoner of his Aunt and Uncle and wants to get away from them. But first he feels the need to contact his sister in Toronto and, hopefully, find out why he was set up like this. She's headed down to Houston with her family for a visit, in the coming July, but all I do is reference how his aunt won't give him Mairead's address so he can write her.

The fact that he just sticks around trying to figure things out on his own after learning this didn't really work...but was necessary. Then I finally saw what was so damned obvious. His sister's upcoming visit in a few months. He puts his plan to disappear on hold till he can talk to her, face to face. Also gives him time to build up some cash and expand on a couple of friendships, in case he needs them.

One of which, with Evangelyne, leads to a nightmare.