STEVE HAYES: Tired Old Queen at the Movies - ADAM'S RIB

Just watched "Adam's Rib" with Spencer Tracy and Katherine Hepburn in my quest to find the best tone for my script, "The Alice '65". Link on the title to view a video critique of the film.

It's been a while since I've seen it, but I remembered it as being a dramatic comedy. Yet everywhere I've looked, it's listed solely as a comedy. Well...I was right. There's some serious stuff in this as well as a lot of humorous. I mean, it starts off with a woman trying to kill her husband; hardly chuckles there. And yet...

This makes me feel a lot better about the humor in A65. Of course, a lot will depend on the ability of the cast to pull it off...but I think it's solid, right now. Once I finish tinkering with it.

Which will be never.

Taxes is fattening...

I just ate WAY too many chocolate chip cookies and drank way too much hot tea while working on my taxes...and working...and working...and now feel like a blimp. Maybe I should do a high colonic or something that was trendy ten years ago.

Fun thing about this is, my brain wanders and I find ideas for stories...and ways to add to "The Alice '65". I have Casey take Adam to a premier of her latest movie, but I never show her acting in it. I wonder if that wouldn't help show the complexity of her relationship with Lando and the breakup that happened? It'd add about 5/8 of a page...just 4 lines...as follows --
----------------
INT. THEATER - NIGHT

Casey watches the film play, the seat by her empty.

ONSCREEN

Casey, too-totally stylish, faces away from Lando, in a suit. A gorgeous beach panorama frames them. Hatred dances between them.

LANDO
So he's already screwing you? Shit -- fast work.

CASEY
Isn't that what you wanted? Quickest way to get a man to trust you is to let him fuck you.

LANDO
Yeah, well -- you'd know all about that.

She spins and slaps him.

CASEY
You really want to find out where the next bomb's gonna be? Then start thinking with the head on your shoulders instead of the one between your legs!

She storms away.

IN THE THEATER

Casey smirks -- glances at the empty seat -- frowns.
-----------

Just that. Shows she's good at her job...and also hints at what their relationship is really like.

Now back to the great madness of numbers..

Nothin' much...

Working on my taxes in preparation for a trip to the CPA, Thursday, so I'm fighting a nasty headache and blurry eyes from so damn much crap.

I've decided Aidan Turner is the perfect personification of Patrick Thomas O'Brien in "Darian's Point", and I'm definitely going to write it as a book. It's set in 1910 on a small island off the western coast of Ireland, and he's a local boy, sort of to the manor born, who's made a success of himself in America as an architect. And despite the social mores and ideas about sex being very restrictive at the time, I can just see even a woman as controlled as Marion, who's an upper crust Boston Brahmin, forgetting herself over this Irish scamp and scandalizing her family.

Now brain wishes to curl up and die...bye-bye...

Madness grows...

I think I've fallen in love with Adam and Casey. This is a very weird yet typical place for me to be in. I wind up here with all my stories. All my characters, as I work with them. They become so real to me, sometimes, I can see everything they do and feel everything that touches them. And reaching the end of a script or story is like reaching the end of a marriage, almost.

When authors talk about the torture of writing, they ain't kiddin'. I've been through this so many times.

I think the hardest was when Bobby Carapisi reveals he's going to kill himself. When that happened, when I was first writing the first draft of the book, I couldn't face it for months. I actually shut down, because I didn't want to see it was where his whole story had been leading. He had to shame me into finishing it...no, all but beg me, so he could be done. So when I finally agreed, I also agreed to make it hurt even more. Make it as honest and painful and necessary a decision as I could.

Now I hear from some readers it's too painful for them to face. And I think, I did right.

With Adam...what happened in this draft is he suddenly revealed just how much it hurts him to be used like he was. Not just by Casey, but by his co-workers. He's suddenly faced with what they really think of him -- nice enough, but not someone they want to know anywhere else but at the office. And not because he's a bad or obnoxious person. He's just not interesting to them. That is brutality defined.

What's good about that is Casey's reaction. And how it changes her. Suddenly, she became full of breath and blood to me, and it shifted earlier things she does in a way that should make her interesting, now. She's got an agenda not really revealed until the final confrontation. And I think it works. I hope it does. I've got three friends reading it now who, I hope, will give me honest feedback.

And so now, Casey and Adam are as real to me as anyone I've actually known in person. I should change my name to Daniel Bettancourt.

Hmm...does that make me scary, yet?

115 Pages

And I'm not going to argue with the length. The story is what it is and I feel comfortable enough to let people read it and give me feedback. Already got one taker. Any others? It's much changed from the first version I was fool enough to let out of my sight.

I think it still needs another couple passes, to make Casey shine more. She's still too low-key for the events, but the way it's being presented...it makes sense.

I took a break after I finished and did paperwork. I also need to prepare for taxes. Man, that's gonna be fun. Then I went back in and clarified some aspects that I think got a little lost. I also decided to pull back on one moment so a similar moment, later, would have more impact.

I also went on a FaceBook page devoted to Russell Tovey and told them he'd be perfect for Adam, hoping he'd see it sometime and maybe ask me about it. Who knows?

During the break, I also started a FaceBook ad for "The Lyons' Den" to see if I can get something more going on the book. I haven't received any figures on what the sales were. I know they aren't a lot, but it'd still be nice to know.

I am going to do A65 as a book. I've removed so much detail in Adam's and Casey's lives, it's all but screaming at me to do it. Question is, when?

Tomorrow?

More partying from A65

This is immediately after what I posted, yesterday:

-------------------------------

INT. LANDO’S KITCHEN - NIGHT

A MICROWAVE DINGS. A steaming box of Macaroni and cheese comes out. Casey sets it on a counter. Adam opens bottles of sparkling water. The kitchen is totally decked out.

CASEY
Nice and crusty ‘round the edge.

ADAM
You sure this is all right?

CASEY
Baby, Lando thinks mac and cheese is beneath him. And I don’t think Veronica eats; she just sucks the life out of people. Which is what I caught her doing, couple weeks ago. That was four helpings of lasagne. With meat.

She scoops the steaming food into two bowls.

ADAM
Should we really have come?

CASEY
-- Had to. But it’s done now.

ADAM
Casey, he’s a fool to let you go.

CASEY
Hear me arguin’?

She hands him a spoon. He looks at her...takes it...digs in.

ADAM
God, this is heaven.

Casey nods her agreement.

ADAM (cont’d)
Casey, I -- I have a vague idea of what you’re going through. I lived with a girl for nearly five years. Then we met for tea, one day, and she said good-bye. When I got home, that night, everything of hers was gone from our flat.

CASEY
She say why?

ADAM
Incompatible. You see, I have this habit of losing myself in research, and forgetting things like meet-ups and anniversaries and such.

CASEY
C’mon, was it really that bad?

ADAM
She wanted me tested for autism. Said I’m too easily distracted by minutia...

Adam notices slips of paper on the refrigerator.

Most are notes and dietary information, but one reads --

Meat - vleis; water - vater; come - kohm; house - huis; go - gaan.

ADAM (cont’d)
Is Lando learning German?

CASEY
He was in Berlin, last week, doing publicity. He’s starting a Pacific tour, tomorrow.

ADAM
You’re not joining him, are you?

CASEY
I’m doing the talk shows.

ADAM
Hardly seems fair. The spelling’s off, on these.

He writes -- Meat - Fleisch; water - Wasser; come - kommen; house - Haus; go - gehen.

LANDO (O.S.)
You’re a book guy!

Adam jolts around. Lando’s behind him, holding Tito’s tablet, showing Adam’s university profile.

CASEY
Lando, what the fuck?

LANDO
He came for your book, and you dragged him into our shit? That’s not cool.

CASEY
Oh, Adam, my ex-boyfwiend had his widdle feewings hurted at me seeing somebody else.

LANDO
That’s fuckin’ ridiculous, Casey. You really think people’re gonna believe you went from a guy like me to a dork like this?

ADAM
Excuse me!

CASEY
Looks aren’t everything, baby.

She aims it at Lando, but it’s Adam who flinches.

LANDO
What else do you care about? You and your buddy, Orisi, makin’ like nobody’s good enough for you.

CASEY
So it’s my fault you dumped me for that plastic slut!?

LANDO
I made one mistake! One fuckin’ mistake, and you’re gonna shit all over me for it?

CASEY
I don’t see her shittin’ anywhere else but here!

LANDO
Aw -- of course. That’s it! You’re not over me, yet.

CASEY
Oh, I am -- totally. Here’s proof.

She slings the bowl of mac & cheese on him. He roars! Adam jumps between them.

ADAM
Casey, I think we should leave.

CASEY
You’re right, baby, we -- .

LANDO
No, you and me -- we still got lots to talk about.

He grabs for her. Adam keeps him back.

ADAM
Lando, stop it!

LANDO
Tito!

Tito appears in the kitchen.

TITO
Yeah?

LANDO
He’s not invited.

Tito yanks Adam away. Lando pulls Casey to another room.

ADAM
Just a minute! Casey! She wants to leave with me!

CASEY
Lando, you son-of-a-bitch, tell Tito to let him go or I’m gonna be screaming about how big you ain’t.

LANDO
After this dumbassed trick? Who the fuck’s gonna listen?

The party-goers’ earplugs are in. They ignore the commotion.

ADAM
Bloody hell, leave me alone!

Tito signals TWO OTHER GUARDS -- that rush Adam out the door.

ADAM (cont’d)
Wait -- Casey!

Earth Mother watches it all and sighs.

EARTH MOTHER
Should’ve used stronger cleansing.

She lights another stick of incense and twirls it around.

A65 ain't gettin' down...

This is the latest incarnation of the party, but it still seems sedate. Anybody got any ideas?

---------------------------------

EXT. LANDO’S HOUSE - NIGHT

Not as big as Casey’s. Too close to Santa Monica Blvd. A driveway curls in front. A valet service does the parking. It is deathly quiet. Even the group of PHOTOGRAPHERS across the street are properly silent.

The Paparazzi Twins scramble to join them.

Brenda (from Australia) is part of their mix.

Casey and Adam still stand in the sun roof as the limo pulls up. They hop out and up to the front door. Tito blocks their path, tablet in hand.

TITO
Hey, Casey.

CASEY
Tito, you beat us here?

TITO
Left soon as the movie was over. You’re not a plus-one on my list.

He shows her the tablet.

CASEY
Wanna be a dead man, on mine?

TITO
Why you comin’ here for, anyhow? Lando’s bitch’ll toss a fit.

CASEY
Just answered your own question.

Tito almost smiles then stands aside. Adam follows Casey in.

INT. LANDO’S HOUSE - NIGHT

Japanese style. Hundreds of lantern lights cover the ceiling. A few PARTY-GOERS dance in TOTAL SILENCE -- texting on their phones -- reading each other’s phones -- laughing at jokes on each other’s phones. A DJ works his turntables by a huge window that looks out on a well-kept yard and pool. The silence is spooky.

A MUSIC GIRL offers Adam and Casey earplugs.

MUSIC GIRL
You may listen through these.

ADAM
What the devil -- ?

MUSIC GIRL
Beverly Hills noise ordinances.

She sets the earplugs in Adam’s ears. MUSIC POUNDS. He quickly removes them.

ADAM
Casey...?

She has vanished.

An EARTH MOTHER whispers up to surround him with incense.

ADAM (cont’d)
Careful...

EARTH MOTHER
We must cleanse your aura.

ADAM
Orisi did enough cleansing, thanks.

She slips a stick of incense into his hair.

EARTH MOTHER
This will make up for it.

Off she goes. Adam removes the stick -- looks around.

ADAM
Casey? Am I in The Twilight Zone?

A WAITER offers a tray covered with glasses of wine. Adam grabs one. ANOTHER WAITER offers a tray of canapes. Adam takes one -- bites into it -- it is AWFUL. He has no napkin so hides behind a lush plant and spits it into the plant’s soil. He swills some wine in his mouth and spits that out, with it.

ADAM (cont’d)
Do these people not eat food?

Lando and Veronica appear -- CROWDS OF PARTY-GOERS burst in, behind them...and keep coming and coming and coming, like they all got off a bus. The dancing party-goers rush over to AD LIB congratulations. Lando is like their god.

Adam backs up to the window to watch. Behind him, a sleek BLACK PANTHER casually crosses the yard.

Lando finally sees Adam -- comes over -- offers his hand.

LANDO
Lando Grissom.

ADAM
Adam Verlain. Good to meet you.

Tito appears -- Googles Adam’s name on his tablet.

LANDO
You’re Casey’s date, right?

ADAM
Yes, we came together.

LANDO
Glad to see she’s finally gettin’ over me. We were worried about her, for a bit.

ADAM
Were you?

Veronica comes up.

VERONICA
Were we what?

LANDO
Just talkin’ shit.

VERONICA
(to Adam)
You’re Casey’s shadow.

ADAM
Sorry? Oh! Yes. You -- you were in Ilithium-Four, as well. Right? The Seeress.

LANDO
Watch out, gorgeous; he read the book.

ADAM
How’d you know -- ?

VERONICA
Shit, you’re not gonna bitch me out for going topless, are you?

ADAM
No. Most certainly not. Though my seat-mate’s mother might have.

VERONICA
Huh? What’s a seat mate?

LANDO
Andrew’s just jokin’, gorgeous.

ADAM
It’s Adam.

VERONICA
Andrew Adam. Cute name. Great accent, too. Who’s your coach?

ADAM
Coach? Oh, I -- I’m from England.

VERONICA
Really? Could’ve fooled me. Why do you guys drive on the wrong side of the road?

ADAM
We don’t; we drive on the right.

Casey come up -- slips an arm around Adam’s.

CASEY
Is this the cool kids’ table?
(to Adam)
Sorry I vanished, baby. Powder room called.

LANDO
Hey, Case.

CASEY
-- Lando. How’s tricks?

She looks straight at Veronica, who glares right back.

LANDO
I’m glad you’re gettin’ out and around, again, Case. Hope we’re all okay now.

CASEY
That’s why I’m here, baby. Prove to the world I’m little miss sunshine.
(to Veronica)
Sometimes it’s easy to move on.

VERONICA
You should know. Word of warning, Andrew; you’re running with a girl who makes a habit of doing that.

Casey tenses. A waiter passes with canapes. Lando grabs the tray and slaps it in Adam’s hands.

LANDO
Oh, here. Here. You guys tried the horse derves? Veronica worked up the recipe.

ADAM
Horse derves? Oh! Um...yes, they’re -- they’re quite interesting.

LANDO
She’s a little health nut, she is. Always makin’ sure I eat right and keep fit and all that crap.

VERONICA
It’s just because I love my Landy, and only want the best for him.

CASEY
Then why’s he with you?

LANDO
Okay, feast. All you want. There’s more comin’. More comin’. Oh...uh, gorgeous, I think I saw Angelina, over there.

VERONICA
With Brad? I wondered if they’d show. Nice to meet you, Andrew.

ADAM
It’s Adam...

Lando hurries her off. Casey glares after them -- looks at Adam and the tray.

CASEY
What you really think of those?

ADAM
Not fit for pigs. Here you go.

He hands it off to a passing waiter.

CASEY
Still hungry?

ADAM
I’m close to foraging in a dust bin.

She forces a smile -- leads him to the kitchen.

Hmm...the party's not partying...

I've tried a couple of ways to run this party after the premier without it just coming across as a "bump-bump-bump" kind of bash but nothing seems to be working. It's still dull and dead as dishwater. I've reversed it and made it very, very quiet with zen overtones...and now I'm thinking of having Casey and Adam get there before it even starts and having the entrance goofy. But I dunno. If anybody has an idea...anything but bodies grinding in dance moves.

Casey's revealed a hidden agenda, and now Adam being drunk fits into her plans, perfectly. So do Orisi's briefs. Funny how things go, sometimes.

I mentioned a bit from "The Court Jester" (1955) -- where Danny Kaye's character is mistaken for a Robin Hood style hero when he's really just a traveling comedian. Hypnosis and misunderstandings make him more and more the hero...until he has to duel a well-trained knight...to the death. But a princess has fallen in love with him and told her lady in waiting, "If he dies, you die."

This video is the first half of the bit, leading up to the duel; it keeps going when the knight learns about the pellet with the poison and the flagon with the dragon...and has just as much trouble keeping it straight.

No rushing around

 Here's a photo I shot, recently, of the Appleton Edition of "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland". The Alice '65 looks a lot like it but was published by MacMillan and has a copyright date of 1866 on the title page.

A copy of this plays strongly in the story, when it looks like the book everyone thinks is the A65 is really a less rare edition. It's still very valuable -- up around $20K -- and the book's boards (the front and back of the book) look almost exactly like the 1865 edition, but it's not nearly non-existent.

I've seen four copies of the '66 since I started this story. It's like they're springing up everywhere, even though only about a thousand were bound for sale. Still...that's a lot more than the fewer than 25 of the presentation copy that are known to be in existence.

I'm settling into the script's rhythm, now, and ignoring all concerns about length as I input the red-pen edit I've done. Giving Adam and Casey a bit more room to breathe helps a lot. So now Act I ends halfway into page 29. Meaning the script should wind up at about 116 pages. I can live with that.

Now it's back to doing my own thing...just like the script wants me to...and damn the confusion.

Hard to please...

I watched 10 minutes of "Superbad" and turned it off. It was so...uninteresting I just couldn't make myself waste any more time with it. Instead, I watched "Mrs. Miniver" on TCM. Hardly a romantic comedy and one of those Hollywood-style idealizations of life in England...but it holds together well in the British "Stiff Upper Lip" sort of way. Got nothing else done.

This day didn't start off right, anyway. I forgot to reset my alarm clock for DST and woke up 20 minutes before I had to be at work. I was only 5 minutes late, but it scrambled my brain at the job, too. I just wanted to sleep and drift and be lazy.

No...wait...I can't say the day was a total waste. I realized I'm missing an opportunity to dig deeper into Casey's past and motivations when Adam talks with Patricia in the kitchen, the morning after the party. I even set it up the night before. I need to explain Casey's connection to the book, and decide if she's the Queen of Hearts or the Mad Hatter (Adam being the Alice character...of a sort).

The script isn't tightly bound to the storyline of "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland"; I just reference it on occasion. Like calling Gertrude a Cheshire cat for being able to sneak over to Casey's home without being seen.

Wait...Adam calls Casey mad, near the end. She's the Hatter. I need to make her madder.

Now if I can just make this script work...